Statistics

I remember taking a class in college about stats, it was horrible really horrible. I am not sure how I passed but I did. I really remember trying to figure out what was a good stat: a really small number or a really big one. In the end it depends on what the stat is, for instance if the odds of winning the drawing for a new TV are 1:5000 you really want to be the 1 not the 5000. However, if the odds of getting cancer are 1:5000 you do not want to be the 1.

When I went to the doctor to get the results of my first biopsy (in Dallas, there were several in StL) my doc busted out a chart to show me what the results mean. We start with the easy to treat types, about 20% of this type if left alone will turn to cancer over time. As we move down the chart the percentage of the cases that result in cancer start going up and up until we get to the last box... there are no statistics. I look at her and she says, 100% of these cases result in cancer over time.... uhhh I am in that box?!?!?

To be honest this was the first time that I realized that I was the 1 in the ratio. I am becoming one out four people that cancer will touch... crap. How did this happen, as I have wrestled with this for several weeks even months I have realized that God has a plan I have no idea what his plan is I only know that I am going to trust this plan.

I have found myself learning to trust that there is a plan for this adventure for me and that in this plan there will be a reward for trusting with my whole heart.

Tomorrow I will tell you about my journey with the early stages of cervical cancer. After that biopsy I was at the last stage before cervical cancer, so technically still precancerous but by the thinnest of margins. Stay tuned for this story.