November goals

As today starts the first month of me being in my new place I thought that I would come up with a list of the things that I would like to get accomplished. I am sure that this will be an incomplete list but I have high hopes that I will get much of this done before thanksgiving. I am so looking forward to heading to my parents house to have some turkey.

The big list:
Buy washer and dryer
Unpack all of kitchen
Buy couch
Figure out living room layout
Start looking at finding a church home
Organize closer
Organize office
Buy fun accent chair
Get a haircut
Find a local library
Complete 12 workouts
Curtains for the bedroom
Buy bath mats and shower curtain for guest bath
Get car stuff together: liscence plates, drivers liscence, toll tag, transfer title (which I already found!!)
Try two new recipes
Finish the papers
Order cable and Internet


In some ways I feel as if this list could go on forever and ever but I don't honestly know what is missing. I am sure I will post this and come up with a million things that need to get done this month. I think for the moment I am going to let the list go and then come back to it later. I think this list might be a little ambitious but I think I am make a lot of it happen. I am so looking forward to showing all of the cool things that I have done around the apartment so far. Bring it on November!!

Happy Halloween

So last year, Lily and I went to several different Halloween pet events. I found her a Bee costume and I think she is possibly the cutest thing ever. I plan on putting her in this tonight while we have dinner so that I can see her super cute face. I am not sure I will be able to put up these pics but I thought I would share these super cute pics from last year.

Super Sad Lily-Bee

Lily: Mom, really I don't like this
Me: Laughing so hard I almost peed my pants

Lily looks pretty happy here... so cute

She would not be still and I was laughing so hard

She looks so much happier in this pic and you can see dino-Piper's tail

First try at getting a good pic

Mom... are you having french fries? Toss one this way

Looking happy to be home 

I am missing my StL friends today, I wish I was around to dress up the dog and have a few beers with the girls. I will be putting Lily in her Bee costume later today... she is going to hate it but I am going to love it.

Lily is adapting well to the new apartment, I think she is enjoying all of the free space and the fact that she gets more walks these days. I hope to get a chance to scope out some of the local parks this weekend so that we can find one where I can let her off the leash and get some energy out. This morning I tried to get her to jump over the little stream... that was a NO. I almost fell in the water, she was so ticked. I can tell that she is still a little uncertain about the apartment since she is sleeping in the bed all night every night but I think over time she will relax some.


Hope you bought a bag of candy that you enjoy and no kids come by looking for candy so you can keep it.

Happy Halloween!!!!

The BIG Move

So last weekend the movers came and started moving stuff around. It has been so crazy. As I don’t have internet it is hard to upload pics but they are coming one of these days. Hiring the movers was one of the best choices that I have made in a long long time since I didn’t really have to move much I mainly just have to unpack. I think the hardest thing was trying to figure out where to put stuff when they were unloading the truck. For the most part I just had them plop everything down in the living room. Thank goodness I didn’t have much furniture. But once they walked out I had a moment where I almost started crying. There was so much stuff and it was everywhere. I didn’t know where to begin and that was hard for me.

My Aunt Judy came by with some essentials and lots of diet coke. This was clutch for me because she helped me move boxes around and then we tried to figure out what to do about the furniture... not going to lie that is going to be a hard puzzle but at the moment I am still enjoying it. Let's see what else... after she left I spent time trying to make sense of my bedroom before I left for the night. In the end all I really did in there was make a mess and make the bed. I love my new duvet cover, again pics to follow later when I can get them off my phone.

On Saturday I brought Lily to our new place and she was so at home she promptly puked on the carpet. As this is pretty normal for our life I just laughed and cleaned it up. I love my dog. I think she is finally settling in to our routine but she is still a little lost. I think in time she is going to adjust to this apartment but it is going to take us a while. 

There are lots of empty boxes around the apartment but it is still crazy trying to figure out where things are and where I put them when I unpacked. I now have several boxes of stuff that is going to goodwill at some point. I don't even know why it is still here. 

Well I should head home and work on more unpacking... I can't wait to see what I find tonight. I can't wait to show you the pics.. hopefully the blogs won't be too spotty prior to internet but either way there is lots to look forward to.

The Results

Sorry it has taken me so stinking long to get back to you about my cone biopsy results, it has been a crazy few days. I guess we should get right to the point: all of my margins were clear. This means that the edges of the biopsy did not show any cancerous cells. That is the wonderful news, however there was a little bad news: what they cut out was CIN3 and CIS. They cut out something called stage zero cancer, if left alone it would have turned into cancer. I am pretty happy with these results but if we are honest I am just greatful to have my results.

My followup appointments will be in six months. I asked if this was pretty normal and since the margins were clear this is normal. For people with not clear margins she sees them every three months. I do have to have two clear pap smears before I can go back to annual screening. I think that in the grand scheme of things I am glad that I have been pretty anal about getting screened.

I have often what is going to be my cause outside of my job and I think that cerviaval awareness is going to be one of my great passions. In all of this I realized that as women we have been taught that our bodies are to be treasured and that anything that happens to them is shameful. I will admit that I was ashamed that I had the early stages of cervical cancer for a variety of reasons. One of the main reasons is that we have been told that all cases of cervical cancer come from HPV and only sluts get HPV. I think that the majority of women don’t get HPV from sleeping with a million men but from being with someone they love.

I believe that there is nothing to be ashamed of, I had stage zero cancer and I beat it. I think that we as women need to not be ashamed of things that happen to us. I am going to try and tell more of this story over time, I will give more details at some point about the surgery so that if you find this blog because you are looking for info it will be helpful.

So in the interest of finally having a cause and keeping after it… make sure you get all checked out at least every other year… while it doesn’t spread fast if you leave it alone it will take more work to take care of it.

Xoxox

H

Precervical cancer

So yesterday I told you that I had the last step of precancer in the cervical cancer plan. So I guess I should give you a tad but of back ground before we get into the most recent adventure. Several years ago and throughout grad school I had several abnormal Pap smears. I looked back at my results and to the best of my knowledge they were ascus cells which is code for these cells are not normal but we don't know how or why.

On my birthday I found out that I had another abnormal test and needed to have something called a colposcopy. This is a minorly invasive biopsy, the afternoon is shot but no long term effects. The results of this colposcopy were more troubling than normal and it was recommended that I have a leep procedure. I told my doc to stuff it and I would deal with this after my defense and move. I have no idea if that was the right thing to do but I did it.

In Dallas I found a new doc, who is amazing, and when I met with her we repeated the colposcopy. These results were explained in detail to me, I have CIN2, CIN3, and CIS cells. CIN3 and cis will definitely turn into cervical cancer if left alone. So I ask what we should do, it turns out that the way my cells spread all over my cervix made it difficult to remove easily so I needed a cold knife biopsy. I will explain this is greater detail later but let's just say she was going to remove a significant portion of my cervix with a scalpel. This was the surgery that I had about a month ago and since I couldn't find much info about this online I will try to detail my experience without grossing anyone out.

The next step is my one month follow up which is tomorrow. I am a little nervous since I don't know the results yet, I am trying to be hopeful and at the same time realize that bad news could still be coming. I am ready for results watch 2012 to be over, I just want to know one way or the other. It has been a crazy few weeks.

I have been hesitant to share this story but I think this is more common that women like to admit. I also think we are taught to never talk about our personal business (ie our lady bits) so when something goes wrong we don't reach out to other women. I am going to try and share the ups and downs of this story so that if you know someone in this story you know what to say. I hope that my story shows you that this is not the end of the world as a diagnosis but just another step in the grand scheme of things. I am so ready to know the results...

Waiting like David

Recently I have begun studying the bible more. I am working through a study by Beth Moore about having a heart like David. I have loved the stories of David since I was young, it took great courage, trust, and strength to stand up to Goliath. This happens when he was young and through out his life he asked The Lord and waited for his answer and then did as he was instructed.

This week my study is about how David waited to settle until god gave him the place to go. I was reminded that once I trusted that god knew where he wanted me and lily to love we found the perfect place. I am excited to see what he has for me and I know that I am going to be in the right place. I know that sometimes Dallas is hard for me but I am confident in the plan that he has for me and that for now this is where I am meant to be.

I don't know that I have always followed his plan but when I do things are better for me. Do you ever experience that you are in the right place at the right time? I know that I am meant to be here and that the future holds great things for me.

Heat Lightning

I have always been a fan of thunderstorms, well perhaps fan is too strong of a word but I do enjoy being able to watch the rain fall from under a roof. In the south, before the storm there is often something that I call heat lightning. This is one of the most beautiful things that I have ever observed. If you aren't familiar with this beauty it is before the rain when the huge thunderheads are rolling in and the lightning arcs between the clouds. This lightning lights up the clouds like the fourth of July.

The other night on my way home from shopping with my Aunts I was driving down a little highway (there are lots of these even in the city) and when I came over the hill I had a chance to watch the lightning. I took a few pics but it is so hard to time the pictures just right I will give you the best one that I have. When I got home I realized that the trees are so high around the house that you couldn't see the lightning anymore.

One of my favorite memories of watching the heat lightning is on a family trip somewhere, I was laying in the coveted backseat and I could watch the lightning play across the fields. I remember asking my dad if it was going to rain and he said it was just heat lightning. He also said that there wouldn't be any rain with the storm but that the lightning would be neat to watch as it flew from cloud to cloud. I think I watched the lightning for hours that night and from then I tend to take time to watch it when I have a chance. MY favorite places to watch the heat lighting are over a lake or the ocean or over a ranch.

Some heat lightning on the horizon

I know that my picture doesn't really do it justice and on the off chance that you have never seen it I grabbed a pic from the web that you can see here. I am looking forward to seeing more of this over year.